the best christmas book ever

today has been a good day. audrey is now five months, hard to believe it. she is such a sweet girl. i met some high school friends for lunch today and she was such a good girl through the whole thing. no one else brought their kids but since daddy had a dental appointment, the babe came with me. she is at an entertaining age right now. she has such a fun sense of humor. she doesn't take her binky much but instead prefers her fingers, doesn't have a particular one she sucks on, just whatever she can get in her mouth...sometimes it is her whole fist, haha. she has a little woodpecker laugh that is so unique and fun. she LOVES television and if it is on she will watch it, she will even strain to turn and watch if her back is facing it. she likes to giggle at her dad. she laughs with me sometimes, but no one can get her laughing the way her dad can. since she was a newborn she has studied everything around her. it is fun to watch her because you can see her taking it all in, observing her surroundings and trying to assimilate. she will not lean her head on anyone's shoulder. she wouldn't even as a newborn, she has to have her head up and be able to see what is going on...you know, be part of the action. she is a sweetheart and i wish i could freeze this moment but since i can't, i try to write down as much as i can about her and take lots of pictures and videotape so i never forget these sweet moments.

it was fun to see my friends today and catch up. it was especially fun to see that a friend of mine who has struggled for years with infertility is pregnant with twins and found out yesterday she is having a boy and a girl. could there be anything more happy? i was choking back tears while talking to her about struggling to conceive because wow, that is familiar to me. after lunch, audrey and i went to the library to pick up a book on hold for me, "the best christmas pageant ever" and can i just say that i love that book. it was one of my favorites as a child and i hadn't read it in years and had all but forgotten about it when it popped into my head on sunday night. it was fun to read it when i put audrey down for a little nap.

it was interesting to think about the christmas story and reflect on mary and how she must have felt.

"But as far as I'm concerned, Mary is always going to look a lot like Imogene Herdman-sort of nervous and bewildered, but ready to clobber anyone who laid a hand on her baby."

i don't know if it is because this is the first time i read this story as an adult or because i am a mother now or the general sappiness i feel during this time of year but i cried all the way through this book. i couldn't help but remember how uncomfortable i was that last month of pregnancy and how anxious i was for the safe arrival of my baby. i remember wanting to be the best mom i could be and give her every advantage. i think of mary feeling tired, hot, uncomfortable, swollen and so in need of a place to rest her head after her travels only to be brought to a barn. i think about my experience when my baby was born, family and friends around us, bringing us food and flowers and two nurses assigned to me at all times to help me when i needed or wanted something...i can't help but think of mary and the humble birth of her Baby. what a woman she must have been to endure all that she did and give birth to the Savior of the world.

i also loved that these children who were the terror of the town would be touched by this story and offer up their own christmas ham (when they don't have two nickels to rub together) as a present for the baby Jesus.

it was fun to read it today. i love christmas movies and books but most are about being a better person, more giving, more loving, etc. or about santa claus. it was a nice change of pace to read a christmas book that made me reflect on the birth of Christ which is what Christmas is really about.