"where there's love, there's room"

growing up with a plethora of siblings, i often heard my mom say, "where there's love, there's room." i specifically remember her saying this when we were on car trips. there were always lots of elbows and legs and complaining was commonplace. i remember driving to my nana's house and trying to fall asleep so that we would get there faster. this is one of those phrases that you have heard so many times that you catch yourself saying when you don't realize it...or if you are me, you say it very much on purpose for comic relief in places with strangers like elevators and restaurants.

when i worked at fidelity investments, i worked in a secure building. basically if you went into a stairwell when your security badge was not activated (which happened from time to time when working beyond your scheduled hours and since overtime was required, it happened fairly often) or you happened to not have your badge with you, you were stuck. did i mention that most cell phones did not get service in this building? suffice it to say, most employees took the elevator...which made for a very crowded elevator and with so many different people working in one building (the chamber of commerce building) you never rode with the same group twice. whenever someone looked annoyed at the last person to run and just make it before the doors closed, i would always say, "where there's love, there's room" sometimes i would even say, "my mom always says, where there's love, there's room" and everyone laughed. i love to make people laugh and i am not a big fan of tension so it worked out very well for me on numerous elevator trips. i have used it in crowded waiting rooms at the doctor's office and at restaurants on busy weekend nights. i sort of fell out of the habit of saying or even thinking about it until tonight. i don't know what the catalyst was that brought it to the forefront of my mind today, but as i was struggling to find sleep i found this all too familiar phrase repeating itself over and over in my mind.

i stopped trying to sleep. it was a vain effort anyway. i started to think about this phrase. i mean, really think about it. where there is love, there is room. where there is love, there is patience. where there is love, there is kindness. i thought about the world that we live in today. how often in life do we find the exact opposite to be the case? where there is room, there is love. or sometimes, where there is room, there is tolerance. if i am bored out of my gourd and you happen to be around then you can use some of my time. if i don't have anything better to do and you have something that interests me, i will put up with you.

it reminds me of something that i experienced today. you learn a lot about yourself when you are a parent. sometimes more than you ever wanted to know. ignorance is bliss, right? you know what else? you learn a lot about other people too. today i met a friend for lunch and i have never had a lunch like that before. audrey was SCREAMING, completely inconsolable. she was fed, her diaper was changed, and out of the blue she went from picture perfect baby to demon spawn...not really, but it was honestly a jekyll/hyde transformation in two seconds flat. i think she is teething. i got up with her and walked around the restaurant and bounced her and took her outside. i whispered in her ear and kissed her cheek and did all the things she loves that usually calm her right down...to no avail. finally, she calmed down (no rhyme or reason to it) and all the people around me that had had their meal interrupted just smiled politely (you know how there are so many types of smiles and some are not polite or kind in the least? these were kind, polite smiles) and everyone who walked by showered compliments and praise on audrey and her mama. i couldn't get over it. how easy would it have been to be agitated that they could not hear themselves think, let alone hear each other with an infant crying and carrying on? instead, they smiled and offered up pleasantries to us. it might sound cheesy, but these complete strangers were so loving. i wondered how i would react in a similar situation. if it were my sister or my best friend, it would be easy to have empathy because i love them. what if it was a stranger? it was a lesson in kindness for me.

i think in the hustle and bustle of life, it is easy to have a "where there is room or time or when you fit into my schedule, there is love" point of view, but what a better world we would live in if we each tried everyday to have more love and open up our hearts to give a little room to those who may need it.